Parenting Advice

Being a parent is the hardest job on earth.

When advice columnist, Ann Landers, asked her older readers how many children they would have if they could do over their lives, the majority said, “none.”  Parenting is sometimes thankless and overwhelming.

I’ve counseled parents for more than three decades and I’ve learned so much from them. In fact, sometimes I wish I could bring up my children – who are all adults now – again. I would do so many things differently. 

In this session I’ll explain the importance of children and rules. In future sessions other ideas about rules  will be explored.

Rules

Children need plenty of rules. Children who do not have sufficient rules become anxious children. They are not sure what is expected of them. They are not sure that they can stop themselves from doing something wrong when they are away from their parents.

When there are not enough rules, a distractible child will compel parents to establish rules by acting up and acting out. If your child behaves well with others and not with you then that child is asking for more clear limits (rules) from you.

Whatever you enforce, your child will do. After a few times of enforcement from you, it will become a good habit.

Does Your Child:

• Always buckle a seat belt?
• Put dishes in the sink after a meal?
• Kiss you when he leaves the house?
• Remain on the sidewalk and not go into the street without your permission?
• Ask and not grab when he wants something another child is holding?
• Say a bedtime prayer?
• Chew with his mouth closed?
• Know not to write on the walls?
• Wash his hands after using the bathroom?

If your child does any or all of these things automatically you have done a good job. These are habits that are learned behavior. You taught them to your child. Your child knows they are important rules he must follow. Add new rules and your child will follow them, too.

There are children who automatically say thank-you when given something, who never put feet on furniture, and who don’t interrupt when others are speaking. These children have learned self discipline and self-control because their parents quietly and regularly insisted they follow rules.

Parenting is the hardest job in the world – and worth it. Successful adults are made in childhood.